Are you DEALING with Your Father Wound?

Do you know the impact on you if you're not?

First, I want to welcome Brandon to Father Wound Fighters! This week’s newsletter will be focused on the impact on us personally of not dealing with our Father Wounds.

I am speaking to a group on Monday about what happens when we don’t deal with our Anger. Jesus is the focus of the interactive discussion. What we are going to reflect on is the impact it would have had on Jesus had he not flipped the temple tables in John 2:13-17 (as well as Matthew 21:12-13, Mark 11:15-17, & Luke 19:45-48). If you don’t know the reference, it is when Jesus drives out those who are buying and selling in the temple. He overturns the tables of the money changers, and the seats of those who sell pigeons, declaring his house should be a house of prayer, not a den of robbers. Jesus deals with his anger is a real and tangible way. And, in this case, a much-needed way. But what if he hadn’t?

A few of the things that probably would have happened are;

1. Had he not, the anger would have stuck with him for days (eating at his insides)

2. He would have certainly dealt with regret for not saying something. Heck, not doing something!

3. If he wasn’t perfect, and without sin, his anger would have probably grown into bitterness as he continued to be reminded of the day when his temple was overrun by godless men.

4. He may have suppressed it, pushing it deeper and deeper into his psyche.

5. People close to him would certainly have noticed, and been impacted negatively.

Thanks be to God that he did do something about it! That’s what Father Wound Fighters is all about. Doing something about it. Why? Because Men who have a Father Wound are generally angry. It’s the impact of having a Father who didn’t measure up to the superhero status a son elevates his Father to, and for good reason. A Dad’s call is one of a superhero. The responsibility of a Father, which we can talk about another day, is extensive! Much is expected. And, God expects it. That is why when Dad falters, a Father Wound is formed. We need to do something about it so that we don’t carry around the anger that is resultant of it.

As Men, not dealing with our Father Wounds will yield anger. It’s natural. Albeit, not welcome, but natural. We may not be aware of it or how it’s impacting those around us, but it most certainly is. The long-term impact our anger can result in is a lack of healthy communication skills where we shout, instead of discuss. We may become overly critical of others because of how hurt we are. We might lack trust. We may remain fearful. That’s why the first step in dealing with our Father Wounds is acknowledgment. When we acknowledge that we’re angry, we can act. It doesn’t mean you should go flipping the conference table the next time you get mad at work, but it does mean you can offer that anger to God. That way his compassion, his peace, and his logical steps forward toward your Dad will be the yield instead.

I look forward to writing to you again next week! Enjoy your weekend!

For the Kingdom,

-Matthew J. Wolak